Maybe Nothing Has Gone Wrong

Remember when you were young and you had this grand plan for how your life would play out?

I remember thinking about how I would have this perfect marriage, and my husband would adore me and be strong in the gospel.

We would have a close relationship where we always got along and never fought and we were best friends.

And I dreamt about how I would be the perfect mom whom my children adored.

And said children would grow up happy and healthy and go on to live lives that were just as perfect as mine.

My husband would be successful in every way and we would have a beautiful home, we would have money to travel and be generous.

I would have a job where I was successful and a leader.

I would have church callings where I helped and served.

In essence, I thought I would live happily ever after.

And then I got married and realized the the anticipated happily ever after wasn't going to be part of my plan.

And it's not just me that comes to that realization.

 We all do at some point.

This realization, understanding that things rarely go according to 'plan', is part of growing up.

Maybe we didn't get married in the timing we thought we would, or even at all.

Maybe children didn't come when and how we thought they would. 

Maybe your husband had his own plans and they didn't correlate with yours.

Maybe he decided that living the gospel was no longer what he wanted to do.

Maybe you don't make as much money as you thought you would. 

Maybe you or your spouse has struggled with pornography.

Maybe you or your spouse has had an affair.

Maybe you ended up getting divorced.

Maybe you or your children have mental health issues that are a consistant struggle.

Most likely, wherever you are, you're not in the place you imagined you would be at this age.

I know I'm not.

Never in a million years did I imagine that I would be someone who would get divorced.

Never did I imagine myself being an entrepreneur and owning my own business.

And yet, here I am.

Something fascinating about our brains is that when things don't go according to plan, they love to tell us that something has gone wrong — terribly wrong.

And it will never be right.

And we may as well give up right now.

This leaves us feeling discouraged, frustrated, and miserable.

But what if nothing has actually gone wrong?

What if the 'ideal' plan we had was actually wrong?

What if what is happening right now is exactly what was supposed to happen and that life is exactly what it's supposed to be? 

What if the path you have been on, with all of the unplanned ups and downs, has led you to the exact path God wants you to be on so you can learn what He needs you to learn?

When I look at my marriage and divorce path, I see that it was difficult and challenging, but also that I have learned so many amazing lessons that I would have never learned otherwise.

I see that I have become a person who is far and beyond what I believe would have been possible to me had I been in a sweet, loving, kind marriage relationship.

And I love the person I am because of the path I've been on.

I do believe that even though the path I've walked is not what I imagined when I was younger, that it is the exact path God has wanted me to walk.

Because of this path, I am able to love and serve and give at a level that would have never been possible.

Because of this path I have been able to find a marriage partner who is invested in an emotionally intimate relationship, who wants to be an equal partner with me.

Because of this path I am growing into a person I didn't know could really exist, a person I really love and am amazed with.

So what about your life?

What if nothing has gone wrong? 

What if where you are is exactly where God has planned for you to be?

Choosing to look at our lives from this perspective can change everything.

Want to dig a little deeper into this concept?

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